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Saturday, January 3, 2009

One-Woman Freak Show

Zina tagged me, before I even started the blog, and I'm supposed to list 6 random, abstract, weird things about myself.

1.  I'm not very hairy.  I once went 2 1/2 years without shaving and no one really noticed.

2.  I do have some very fine, soft, pale hair on my face, especially on my upper lip and on my jawline right in front of my ears.  I was looking in the mirror one day when I was pregnant with Adam and I noticed that maybe there was more of it there on the sides of my face than before, so I started pulling it out, and -- !!! -- it had gotten to be, like, 2 inches long. My "angel moustache" was thicker and longer, too.  Of course I had to shave it, even though it was nearly invisible.  It came back again when I was pregnant with Ellen.  I was the lady who shaves her face but not her legs.

3.  I can sing off-tune, on purpose, exceptionally well.  I can make it as slight or as drastic as I want.  I do it to amuse myself sometimes.  It drives Peter crazy.  Most people who sing off-tune aren't doing it by choice, and you'd be surprised at how many people with good pitch aren't able to sing off-key deliberately.

4.  I don't watch television, and I've never paid for cable in my life.  It's not a matter of principle, I just got out of the habit a couple of decades ago and never got back into it.  I do watch during General Conference and the Olympics. I think The Office is hilarious and I've seen a lot from the first four seasons on TiVo at my mom's house, but I always forget to turn on the TV when it's on.   Don't feel sorry for me -- the internet helps me fulfill my time-wasting needs.

5.  My right foot was once run over by a bus.  It was in Japan during the morning rush hour (I added this so you'll know the bus was as heavy as it could have been when it happened).  I got knocked off my bike and under the bus.  Miraculously, no bones were broken, but it swelled up to an enormous size and to this day it feels itchy and tickles in annoying and hard-to-describe ways on the inside sometimes from the soft-tissue damage I sustained.  (I can feel it right now, in fact.)  And my right ankle has been bigger than my left ankle ever since.   There's a faith-promoting story associated with this incident, but I'll save it for another post.

6.  In my lifetime I've received paychecks for (among other things): stapling math packets together,  making copies in a law office, selling lingerie, working in an elementary school library, working at a university library reference desk, doing some recording work for Deseret Book, writing an inspirational piece about the invention of the ATM for the Franklin-Covey company, soloing  with the Utah Symphony, writing product copy for an online store that never launched, singing with the Utah Opera chorus, providing Xena's "fight sounds and battle cries" for the Xena:Warrior Princess video game, conducting library research for a California environmental consulting company, giving voice lessons to teenagers, proofreading/editing, performing at the Utah Governor's Arts Ball, and one signed by Gordon B. Hinckley for dancing around in a pig costume and dressing as a giant Christmas tree.